Vilkapzimdonmonont is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, irritating tortoise.

Vilkapzimdonmonont created the Tadpole Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vilkapzimdonmonont, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Vilkapzimdonmonont, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Vilkapzimdonmonont's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Vilkapzimdonmonont's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about bats.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never feed grapes to badgers while wearing skirts.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.