Nullgutbop is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, unselfish dolphin.

Nullgutbop created an up quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nullgutbop, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Nullgutbop, she will make you grow a tail.

Nullgutbop's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Nullgutbop's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no eagles in a building before entering it.

2. Always obey Nullgutbop's priests.

3. Never talk about quantum mechanics near swans while wearing brown boots and balancing eight platinum spheres on your legs.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never look at galaxies.