Kemyam is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, vain gerbil.

Kemyam created the Black Eye Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kemyam, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Kemyam, he will turn you into a sheep.

Kemyam's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Kemyam's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump in holy places.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Kemyam on top of all buildings.