Wotgubmig is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, narcissistic naga.

Wotgubmig created matter three billion years ago.

If you believe in Wotgubmig, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Wotgubmig, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Wotgubmig's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Wotgubmig's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from yellow dolphins, for they are unholy.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Wotgubmig.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Wotgubmig loves moths, so they must be respected.

5. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.