Hugnartlun is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, conceited tortoise.

Hugnartlun created the Milkyway three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hugnartlun, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Hugnartlun, it will throw large rocks at you.

Hugnartlun's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Hugnartlun's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum gravity.

2. Run away if nine otters approach from the north.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Run away from magenta ducks, for they are unholy.

5. Do not drink alcohol.