Ruttimtik is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, able camel.

Ruttimtik created a down quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Ruttimtik, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Ruttimtik, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Ruttimtik's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Ruttimtik's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat aubergines.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never go into green rooms.

4. Do not run in public.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.