Flablargpak is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, cheerful dog.

Flablargpak created light four years ago.

If you believe in Flablargpak, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Flablargpak, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Flablargpak's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Flablargpak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Never talk about electromagnetism near shrews while wearing violet stockings and balancing five lead spheres on your back.

3. Do not hop in public.

4. Never think about galaxies.

5. You must love Flablargpak.