Bodhanstik is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, deceitful hippopotamus.

Bodhanstik created the universe five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bodhanstik, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bodhanstik, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Bodhanstik's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Bodhanstik's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat ducks with great respect.

2. Never mention manatees.

3. Do not wear indigo clothing.

4. Do not shave your face.

5. Never wear violet ear rings.