Milgomyak Litarpkon is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, two-faced porpoise.

Milgomyak Litarpkon created the Sun six billion years ago.

If you believe in Milgomyak Litarpkon, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Milgomyak Litarpkon, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Milgomyak Litarpkon's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Milgomyak Litarpkon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your neck.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Milgomyak Litarpkon.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never think ill of sick snakes.

5. Do not wear lead on your body.