Lagxembass is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, irritating naga.

Lagxembass created the Small Magellanic Cloud four billion years ago.

If you believe in Lagxembass, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Lagxembass, she will turn you into a mouse.

Lagxembass' most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Lagxembass' Holy Commandments

1. Hide from violet rats for they are unholy.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.