Bomlabgig is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, ill-tempered dugong.

Bomlabgig created the solar system five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bomlabgig, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Bomlabgig, he will turn you into a rat.

Bomlabgig's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Bomlabgig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near whales while wearing indigo shorts and balancing eight carbon spheres on your face.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never eat turnips.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.