Fudquattap is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, fast narwhal.

Fudquattap created the Milkyway five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fudquattap, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Fudquattap, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Fudquattap's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Fudquattap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat spinach.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Do not wear gray clothing.

5. Do not stand on grass.