Jaddibcepben is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, impressive ferret.

Jaddibcepben created humanity four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jaddibcepben, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Jaddibcepben, she will turn you into a tree.

Jaddibcepben's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Jaddibcepben's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat gooseberries.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Run away from pink squirrels, for they are unholy.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not commit murder.