Signurlbeg is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, ruthless lion.

Signurlbeg created Mount Everest six million years ago.

If you believe in Signurlbeg, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Signurlbeg, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Signurlbeg's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Signurlbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry dogs.

2. Never chant in holy places.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Never talk about optics near moths while wearing magenta skirts and balancing eight tin spheres on your back.

5. Put Signurlbeg first in all things.