Vidnabgonvad is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, dishonest hare.

Vidnabgonvad created a photon seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vidnabgonvad, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Vidnabgonvad, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Vidnabgonvad's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Vidnabgonvad's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick mice.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not trade with those who eat cherries.

4. Never feed limes to bats while wearing magenta shoes.

5. Do not hurt swans.