Fossdamflig is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, contented badger.

Fossdamflig created snails nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fossdamflig, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Fossdamflig, she will turn you into a snail.

Fossdamflig's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Fossdamflig's Holy Commandments

1. Squirrels are not to be trusted.

2. Do not wear gray clothing.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never bounce in the presence of goats.

5. Never look in ponds.