Tagcedpad is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, charitable crane.

Tagcedpad created light seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tagcedpad, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tagcedpad, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Tagcedpad's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Tagcedpad's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about electromagnetism near monkeys while wearing white ear rings and balancing seven zinc spheres on your back.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

3. Run away from green frogs, for they are unholy.

4. Never hurt mice.

5. Erect a giant platinum sculpture of Tagcedpad in the centre of the settlement.