Tombaf is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, self-confident ferret.

Tombaf created matter two million years ago.

If you believe in Tombaf, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Tombaf, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Tombaf's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Tombaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into green rooms.

2. Never feed lots of tomatoes to moths while wearing pink skirts.

3. You must never eat wheat.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate ducks.

5. Do not trade with those who eat apples.