Besttigjabparkbast is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, caring jaguar.

Besttigjabparkbast created the planet Venus five million years ago.

If you believe in Besttigjabparkbast, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Besttigjabparkbast, it will be very sad.

Besttigjabparkbast's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Besttigjabparkbast's Holy Commandments

1. Squirrels are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never sit in the presence of pigs.

5. Do not wear gray clothing.