Nillbepcar is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, thoughtless weasel.

Nillbepcar created a photon six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nillbepcar, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nillbepcar, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Nillbepcar's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Nillbepcar's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nillbepcar.

4. Never think about special relativity.

5. Always obey Nillbepcar's priests.