Xemflabstan is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, prudent raccoon.

Xemflabstan created the cosmos six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xemflabstan, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Xemflabstan, she will turn you into a duck.

Xemflabstan's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Xemflabstan's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat spinach.

2. You must pray to Xemflabstan five times a day.

3. Do not wear green clothing.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Never talk about manatees.