Timpignel is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, clever troll.

Timpignel created an up quark four years ago.

If you believe in Timpignel, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Timpignel, it will not care at all.

Timpignel's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Timpignel's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Always help sick shrews.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Do not speak about spinach.

5. You must pray to Timpignel eight times a day.