Yarllantail is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, omniscient jellyfish.

Yarllantail created the planet Venus eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarllantail, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Yarllantail, he will turn you into a tree.

Yarllantail's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Yarllantail's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into mauve rooms.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not covet oxen.