Dobfotpithivcumhas is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, quiet parrot.

Dobfotpithivcumhas created dark energy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Dobfotpithivcumhas, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dobfotpithivcumhas, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Dobfotpithivcumhas' most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Dobfotpithivcumhas' Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Dobfotpithivcumhas three times a day.

2. Dobfotpithivcumhas loves shrews, so they must be respected.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Put Dobfotpithivcumhas first in all things.

5. Do not shave your head.