Dodcap is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, witless gorilla.

Dodcap created dark energy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Dodcap, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dodcap, he will be very unhappy.

Dodcap's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Dodcap's Holy Commandments

1. Erect seven lead sculptures of Dodcap on top of important buildings.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never write about gravity.

4. Never eat aubergines.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.