Teenlipjig is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, dishonourable badger.

Teenlipjig created a charm quark two years ago.

If you believe in Teenlipjig, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Teenlipjig, it will turn you into a rock.

Teenlipjig's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Teenlipjig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Do not keep five eagles in a large pit.

5. Do not wear aluminium on your body.