Yimtappib is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, conceited monkey.

Yimtappib created dark energy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yimtappib, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Yimtappib, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Yimtappib's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Yimtappib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never paint your feet orange.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate doves.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.