Cancarhin is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, flying fairy.

Cancarhin created a top quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Cancarhin, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cancarhin, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Cancarhin's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Cancarhin's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat nuts.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate otters.

3. Erect a giant gray sculpture of Cancarhin in the centre of the settlement.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not wear green clothing.