Sandafapp is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, idiotic walrus.

Sandafapp created tapeworms three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sandafapp, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Sandafapp, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Sandafapp's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Sandafapp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt nematodes.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

5. Do not wear silicon on your body.