Vigpakzan Arpjanfid Kikdidbaf is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, merciless deer.

Vigpakzan Arpjanfid Kikdidbaf created the universe nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vigpakzan Arpjanfid Kikdidbaf, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Vigpakzan Arpjanfid Kikdidbaf, she will destroy your home planet.

Vigpakzan Arpjanfid Kikdidbaf's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Vigpakzan Arpjanfid Kikdidbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never talk about nebulae.

5. Never think about gravity.