Larpnuljab is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, flying cobra.

Larpnuljab created vertebrates eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Larpnuljab, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Larpnuljab, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Larpnuljab's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Larpnuljab's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt monkeys.

2. Hide if seven whales approach from the west.

3. Learn six new languages a year.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Erect a giant copper sculpture of Larpnuljab in the centre of the settlement.