Habzigpib is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, competent finch.

Habzigpib created time and space two years ago.

If you believe in Habzigpib, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Habzigpib, it will turn you into a sheep.

Habzigpib's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Habzigpib's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Do not speak about corn.

5. Pray towards the east.