Yarlzogjig is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, astonishing raccoon.

Yarlzogjig created water two million years ago.

If you believe in Yarlzogjig, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Yarlzogjig, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Yarlzogjig's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Yarlzogjig's Holy Commandments

1. Yarlzogjig loves squirrels, so they must be respected.

2. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

3. Yarlzogjig must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate otters.

5. Never think ill of sick ducks.