Padhimdud is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, thoughtless guinea pig.

Padhimdud created the cosmos three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Padhimdud, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Padhimdud, she will torture you forever.

Padhimdud's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Padhimdud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Padhimdud's name in vain.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not kill aardvarks.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Do not shave your hands.