Mabjatvig is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, duplicitous sheep.

Mabjatvig created an up quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Mabjatvig, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Mabjatvig, he will turn you into a rock.

Mabjatvig's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Mabjatvig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear mauve clothing.

2. Never laugh in holy places.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Mabjatvig.

4. Do not trade with those who eat cherries.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.