Quatniglist is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, benevolent cow.

Quatniglist created silver four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quatniglist, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Quatniglist, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Quatniglist's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Quatniglist's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair turquoise.

2. Do not kill shrews.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never go into purple rooms.