Motloplap is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, awe-inspiring clam.

Motloplap created the Sun eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Motloplap, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Motloplap, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Motloplap's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Motloplap's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Motloplap on top of all buildings.

2. Turtles are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not keep five tapirs in a large pit.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never think about comets.