Handonspag is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, caring yak.

Handonspag created energy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Handonspag, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Handonspag, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Handonspag's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Handonspag's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry otters.

2. Handonspag loves frogs, so they must be honoured.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Handonspag.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.