Madtamcan Quillvonpark Legfebcum is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, dishonourable aardvark.

Madtamcan Quillvonpark Legfebcum created the Cigar Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Madtamcan Quillvonpark Legfebcum, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Madtamcan Quillvonpark Legfebcum, he will throw large rocks at you.

Madtamcan Quillvonpark Legfebcum's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Madtamcan Quillvonpark Legfebcum's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt gulls.

2. Always help sick sharks.

3. Worship no other gods but Madtamcan Quillvonpark Legfebcum.

4. Do not dye your hair violet.

5. Erect nine tin sculptures of Madtamcan Quillvonpark Legfebcum on top of important buildings.