Hinvidjon is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, passionate hippopotamus.

Hinvidjon created oxygen six million years ago.

If you believe in Hinvidjon, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Hinvidjon, it will turn you into a rat.

Hinvidjon's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Hinvidjon's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never paint your legs mauve.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never wear green coats.