Flambonwik is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, all-knowing wyrm.

Flambonwik created the planet Earth six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flambonwik, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Flambonwik, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Flambonwik's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Flambonwik's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Hide from fawn birds for they are unholy.

3. Never eat rice.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.