Lunhogmip is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, weak beaver.

Lunhogmip created the solar system five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lunhogmip, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Lunhogmip, she will turn you into a goat.

Lunhogmip's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Lunhogmip's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Lunhogmip in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always obey Lunhogmip's priests.

3. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Lunhogmip on top of all buildings.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.