Jadmifmutnurl is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, omnipotent dog.

Jadmifmutnurl created a top quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Jadmifmutnurl, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Jadmifmutnurl, he will try to impress you with trees.

Jadmifmutnurl's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Jadmifmutnurl's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if four dolphins approach from the south.

2. Never think about stars.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.