Aftarkop is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, moody walrus.

Aftarkop created the planet Mars three million years ago.

If you believe in Aftarkop, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Aftarkop, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Aftarkop's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Aftarkop's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Aftarkop.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not drink alcohol.