Govbastapp is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, ruthless hippopotamus.

Govbastapp created everything that exists two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Govbastapp, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Govbastapp, it will manifest in front of you.

Govbastapp's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Govbastapp's Holy Commandments

1. Govbastapp loves capybaras, so they must be honoured.

2. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Govbastapp on top of all buildings.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

5. Retreat if four frogs approach from the south.