Podcinmat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, annoying turtle.

Podcinmat created matter five million years ago.

If you believe in Podcinmat, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Podcinmat, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Podcinmat's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Podcinmat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chant in public.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never paint your legs black.

5. Pray towards the west.