Xucfatjin is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, all-knowing troll.

Xucfatjin created gold four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xucfatjin, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Xucfatjin, she will manifest in front of you.

Xucfatjin's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Xucfatjin's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at nebulae.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always wear brown.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not take Xucfatjin's name in vain.