Flowjadxen is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, effective rat.

Flowjadxen created light three million years ago.

If you believe in Flowjadxen, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Flowjadxen, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Flowjadxen's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Flowjadxen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Erect a giant pink sculpture of Flowjadxen in the centre of the settlement.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Learn six new languages a year.

5. Do not listen to music.