Nellflykik is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, omniscient faun.

Nellflykik created a bottom quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Nellflykik, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Nellflykik, she will throw large rocks at you.

Nellflykik's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Nellflykik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in black rooms.

2. Do not eat rice.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nellflykik.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Do not chop down trees.