Dangofvan is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, competent octopus.

Dangofvan created an atom eight million years ago.

If you believe in Dangofvan, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dangofvan, he will turn you into a hamster.

Dangofvan's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Dangofvan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dangofvan.

3. You must pray to Dangofvan seven times a day.

4. Do not wear yellow clothing.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Dangofvan.